Praying For You

When I was in middle school, I went to this amazing summer camp with my church called The Edge. It was a week full of fun games, competitions, skits, and of course, worship. Every year there would a guy leading worship named Wayne Kerr, think 40 year old man with over processed hair trying to connect with middle schoolers. Despite his hair, everyone loved him. Anyways, he always played this one song that I absolutely loved and for some reason it was stuck in my head last night and it got me thinking. 

The song that was stuck in my head was "My Prayer for You" by Wayne Kerr (I couldn't find the video on Youtube, but here's the lyrics). A little bit of the chorus goes like this: 

"That you could have joy like you've never known

Peace, and a happy home

Time to be all alone

This is my prayer, my prayer for you."

These are all sweet blessings to be wished upon someone which got me thinking, how to I pray for other people? Do I pray for them at all? Now, if someone is sick or hurting, of course I pray for healing for them. But what about for a regular person for no reason? Nope, not normally. That's sad. 

Not only do I not normally pray for other people, when I do, it's not always good. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't sit here actually praying to God that someone would get hurt or that something bad would happen to them. But, I do think and wish it sometimes, and God knows all of our thoughts, so it's basically the same thing. God calls us to pray for even our enemies hearts. Immediately, this makes me think of a country song by Jaron and The Long Road to Love called "Pray For You." (Here's a link to the song) The song is about how the preacher told him that he needed to pray for those who have wronged him and this is his prayer;

"I pray your brakes go out running down a hill

I pray a flowerpot falls from the window sill and knocks you in the head like I'd like to

I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls

I pray your flying high when your engine stalls 

I pray all your dreams never come true

Just know wherever you are honey, I'm praying for you."

Okay, so that may be a little extreme, but this is more like what my prayers for other people are sounding like, and I would be willing bet big money that I am not the only one. 

Whenever we are wronged by someone, we like to think that "karma" will get them back. Well, hate to break it to you, but there is no such thing as karma. Most of us know that, but we don't like the idea that we are praying for something bad to happen to someone, so we chalk it up to karma. OR we like to thing that God will spite them for what they have done. We don't like to think about how God is a forgiving God at the time, or how many times He has forgiven us when we have wronged others. Simply put, we are selfish people, which is no surprise. We don't like to be the bigger person. 

I'm challenging myself to pray more for people, for no absolute reason. Not the spiteful prayer, but more of a prayer like Wayne Kerr's. I'm also going to pray that God will work with me and mature my heart, so that I can pray honestly wanting good for those who have wronged me. I know it's not going to be a fast change, but nothing ever is. I also want to challenge you to look at your prayers, wishes, and thoughts and think about if you would want someone praying for those things about you. It can change your mind if you turn the tables your direction. 

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Sorry for taking so long to post again.... Life took over!

Over the past week, I've been running around nonstop and this is the first time I feel like I've been able to just breathe.... 

Last week, I spent a few days during the work week in Clemson interviewing potential interns, which was weird! But the trip itself was a nice break from the normal work week and I learned a lot about future interviews I'll have to have. 

My mom came up for a couple of day this weekend and it was great to spend time with her and not do much of anything.

And now it's Monday. I was very late for work. It's been raining all day. Traffic was hell this morning because of the three different wrecks I passed. But hey, at least I remembered to wear green today! Happy St. Patty's Day!

The past couple of days, I feel like I've been knocked back instead of my forward pursuit of joy.

UGH! How frustrating it is! Why do I do this to myself? I think WAYYY too much. And I don't think it's helping that everyone's on spring break and I'm stuck at the office.

Lately, I feel like no matter how hard I try to move past this, life knocks me back down again. I keep trying to push on and defeat this demon, but I just can't.

This afternoon I got the most beautiful advice. It wasn't telling me to push forward, it wasn't telling me to get back on my horse, it wasn't anything like that.... It was this: 

"I’d just encourage you to keep sitting with that struggle…look it in the face and see what’s underneath it and what it’s trying to tell you, what God may have tucked away inside. Sometimes that takes forever to finally discover…but when we hold out and finally do, it’s just the most beautiful thing."

Thank you again and again and again for this advice. I am determined to figure out what God is trying to tell me and what He has planned for me. 

I'm trying to prepare myself for the fact that His plan may not be anything close to what mine is. I know that He knows best.. I KNOW that... but sometimes it's hard to TRUST in that. 

I've spent many nights crying out to God, begging Him to show me what his plan is, but now it's His turn to talk and my turn to listen. I'm great at talking to Him, not so fantastic at waiting for His answer or listening to Him. 

I may not get His answer right away, but that's alright. After all, everything is in His timing, right? And it may not be exactly what I want to hear, but I'm not God, am I? 

So, if I happen to come across your mind this week, please pray for me. Pray I will continue to seek God's help, but also pray I would shut up and listen to what He has to say. Pray that whatever His answer is, I will find peace in and know that He knows best. Pray that I will be able to look my demon straight in the face and find what God has tucked inside. 

Does All Really Mean ALL?

I have come to an outstanding realization.... y'all ready?!?

I cannot do it.

Simple as that. There is no way, shape, or form that I am able to get through life on my own. Not that I didn't know this before, but I have realized that this has to do with EVERY aspect of my life. I can't get through school on my own, I can't get through work on my own, relationships, friendships, I can't do anything on my own. And this does not just apply to me! Hate to break it to you, but you cannot do it either. I know I know, you're probably the smartest, strongest, blah, blah, blah, sorry, NO! 

Alright, so since we all know that we cannot do it alone, why do we continue to try? Well, my theory is that we are all just too stubborn, or maybe that's just me. ;) Maybe we're prideful, it's like a man who won't ask for directions even though he is clearly lost. Or maybe we feel like we have something to prove. So many people have told us that we can't and by all means, we're gonna do it! Honestly, I hate to be the one to burst your bubble or shot your pride, but it cannot be done. 

So all this talk about how we can't, here's how we CAN get through life. The only way is to give it all, and I mean ALL, to the Lord our Savior. I know we teach our children that they can do anything that they set their minds to, but we should be teaching them Philippians 4:13; "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." It doesn't say, "I can do all things if I really try hard, or if I am determined." We have to have God with us in all areas of our lives. I have had trouble lately with that word "all." Sure, it's easy to give Him our church life, maybe even our family life, but when He wants our school life or our relationship life, YIKES! We try so hard to keep it separate, thinking "this has nothing to do with that," but that's just wrong. We serve a God that created all things good and you don't think He has anything to do with Clemson University? That's one of the greatest goods He created!! Obviously, I'm kidding, kinda, but you get my point. Every part of our life has to do with Him. He created everything, our purpose here on earth is to glorify Him, so how could we separate Him from other aspects of our lives? And why do we try?

What I believe we fail to remember is that God is a god of mercy and forgiveness. Yes, obviously, He hates when we sin, but He still loves us the same. Even though every aspect of our lives may not be perfect, He wants ALL of it; the good, the bad, and the ugly. I know, easier said than done. It's something that you're going to have to work on probably for the rest of your life, but it is worth it, I promise. God has promised us that He will cover up all of our sins, but how can He do that if we don't give them to Him? It sounds so easy, but every time something happens we tend to run and tell our best friends rather than God. Why do we do that? Some might say just cause of convenience, but that's just not true either. 

Praying is the most convenient thing ever! You can pray absolutely wherever you are, whenever, and honestly, you don't even have to close your eyes. So why don't we do it as often as we should? After all, God calls us to be in constant prayer with Him. One of the main things I struggle with about prayer is I feel like everything I say has to be planned and well thought out. I have always viewed prayer as very formal; you start with "Dear God" and end with "Amen," but it does not always have to be like that. We tell little kids to talk to God like you are talking to a friend, but I promise I don't talk my best friend with "Dear Sarah" and "Amen." And yes, of course there is a time and a place for formal prayer, but your daily life does not have to be it. 

Another thing I struggle with is what all I should pray about.... Here's a simple answer: EVERYTHING! There are the obvious prayer request like "help grandma get rid of her cancer" or "help me to become a nicer person," but God wants you to ask for even the little things. We so often think that God doesn't want anything to do with our little problems such as a fight with a friend or car problems, but He cares about every aspect of your life. Not only do we need to pray for help, we always need to pray and thank Him. Thank Him for the big things He has done like die for our sins and for the small things like letting us have a safe trip. Another thing we are called to pray about, which I think people (including myself) struggle with the most, is confession and forgiveness. There are so many things that we do during the day that dissatisfies God that by the time we lay our head down out night, a book could be written about it. I believe this one is the hardest because it is admitting that we are not perfect. Actually, we are far, far, far from it! Once again, God is a forgiving God, but we have to ask for forgiveness in order for it to be given to us. 

So how do you think your life would be different if you let God be apart of every aspect of it? Do you think you would become a happier person? I do. I think letting God into your deepest, darkest corners will allow your life to be lighter and brighter. You don't have to carry the burden of your sins, He's already done that for you on the cross. He already knows how horrible and messed up we are, but He loves us still. There are very few people in the world that I can say confidently that they would love me no matter what I did to them. We have done the worst thing possible to God and He showers us with love. That, right there, is a God that I want to in control of my life, EVERY part of my life. So to answers the question: YES, all really means all! 

So pray. Pray that I would be willing to give everything to Him. Pray that you would be able to do that same. Pray that we all would be comforted it the fact that even though we cannot, He can.