I was so looking forward to this weekend. My first weekend back in Clemson since mid-December. I would get to see my boyfriend and most of my friends. I was excited for life to seem somewhat normal, even if it was just for a weekend. But it didn't end up quite like that. It ended up being a pretty crappy friend weekend. A weekend where I spent almost the whole ride home crying because that wasn't how it was suppose to go. I was so mad at them and so upset that I felt like I had nobody to talk to about it because nobody truly knew how I felt. And that's when my phone started ringing.
My sister, Caroline, was calling. She lives in Kansas with her husband and adorable 1 year old daughter and we don't get to talk that much. I let it ring out the first time because I didn't want her to know that I was crying. After a few minutes, I cleared my thought and called her back. I didn't tell her what happened that weekend and she didn't ask why my voice sounded so weak. We just talked like sisters. She put her daughter on the phone so I could hear her gibber jabbering and I asked how her husband's time off was. We talked about her friend problems and even though it made me sad that even as grown adult, we still have friend drama, it made me realize that it's just a part of life. The ones that truly matter will be there for you. We talked for about an hour and even without realizing it, she made me feel a million times better.
By the time I hung up the phone, I was back in Charlotte at my other sister's, Christina, house. I was greeted at the door by screaming nephews saying "AUNT MER MER!" That is a feeling that not many things can top. After a few minutes, my mom (who was in town for the weekend) asked me how Clemson was. I hesitated trying to answer and tried to leave it at a simple "It was okay." My sister knew something had gone wrong right away and asked what had happened. I gave a quick synopsis of the weekend and they offered up a few encouraging words.
Later that night, Christina and I head to life group, a church bible study. In the car she asked for a little bit more details of the weekend and really gave me insight of college. She assured me that the people in life who truly love you will stick with you.
At life group, I was overwhelmed with happiness. I was surround by people who were all at least five years older than me and most were married and had kids. Our differences didn't stop them from truly encouraging me. People who I barely knew, only met a couple of times, wanted to know how life was going for me and how my internship was. They talked to me like I had been friends with them for a long time and included me any way possible. I was genuinely laughing for the first time all weekend. How could people I barely knew make me feel this way when my own "best friends" made me feel quite the opposite.
I realized that putting my happiness in other people's hands will never end well. My happiness can only come from Him above. I had put so much pressure on this weekend in Clemson and on my friends to be the absolute best when God wanted me to realize that only He can provide true happiness. I have been so focused on how I can make myself happy lately, that I have forgotten to look above me, to the only One that can bring me pure joy.
I am so thankful for my family who is always there to encourage me and even ask me the hard questions that I sometimes don't want to answer. A little encouragement can go a long way. I challenge everyone today to look around them and find at least one person to encourage today. You don't always know what people are going through, people can hide things very well, but maybe your encouraging words will send them back to prayer or make them raise their heads to the Lord. A simple "I love you" or even "You look great day" can cause a great effect.
So those of you who are still reading:
You're an amazing mom!
You're a fantastic husband!
You are beautiful, inside and out.
You mean the world to someone!
People love you just the way you are, even if you don't realize it.
No comments:
Post a Comment